A Pat on the Back

I know my last post was all about me trying to figure out who I am and also make sure I am doing things to better myself.  I promise, as much as I can, I have been actively trying.  I think a lot of the time I tend to spend most of my time talking about my kids because I have never been that confident in myself.  I don't like talking about myself, and I rarely enjoy attention.  But for once, without any shame (or dignity for that matter) I will be talking about me, and some important changes and accomplishments I have made.

Last summer I was going to the gym pretty regularly and kinda enjoyed it.  I made some strides, but really wasn't taking it to seriously.  Once the school year started, though, I was a goner. This school year was really trying and between that and two kids three and under, I barely had energy to get out of the car when I got home from work, let alone, go to the gym. I mean, I made it once or twice, but that was it.

Then a friend and I (Hi Jane!) decided we needed to get our butts in gear and signed up for the Y-Fit Challenge at the gym.  Basically, it was the Biggest Loser at the Y, but without the voting off.  For 10 weeks we worked out crazily and watched everything we ate.  I upped my gym visits from 0 times per week to 3 three times per week.  I kept going and persevered.  And while we didn't win (though we came close), we finished!  

In that 10 weeks I dropped 24 pounds but gained so much more.  I made new friends, people who are also working towards something like I am, and even strengthened friendships I had before.  I now love the gym and go 6-7 times per week.  I don't feel guilty when I can't make it, but sad, because the gym has become like my church or sanctuary, a place where I can have some me time and reflect on the day.  I look forward to my gym time (even at 5:30 am) whether it's just me on a machine or a class I'm taking.

I was worried when the Challenge ended I wouldn't be able to keep it up, but I'm proud to say I have.  I'm down 32 pounds now and today I finished my first Couch 2 5K workout.  I ran/walked a very slow 18 minute mile, but that's an accomplishment for me and I'm proud of it.  

The best part of this whole thing is that the competition is no longer my motivator; I am.  It's not about counting the calories or losing more pounds than others, it's about being able to do the things I used to not be able to do: stay on the elliptical for 60 minutes at a time, run on the treadmill, being flexible enough to touch my toes without bending my knees, having the energy to do things with my kids, and of course feel good about myself.

I know I still have a long way to go, but my confidence is building every day, as is my resolve to keep going, and right now, that's what matters.